By / 28th March, 2014 / T-Shirts, Video Game T Shirts / No Comments

Sabotage Review

I don’t say sabotage.  I say sabataage.

Sabotage Movie

For every job there is a specific tool.  You wouldn’t use a scalpel to cut a path through a rain forest and you wouldn’t use garden shears to give yourself a haircut (at least, I don’t anymore).  If there were a tool perfect for use in this movie it would be Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Sabotage Arnold SchwartzeneggerI’m not saying he doesn’t do well in other roles, although the comedy movie he did recently in the Last Stand did not serve him at all.  However it appears director David Ayer (End of Watch, Training Day, the Fast and the Furious) took a hard look at Arnold’s careers and realized his best roles had a minimum of comedy to them (except for maybe Kindergarten Cop) and he is best when he is deadly serious.  He then collected a very talented cast of equally bad asses, employed more than the Hollywood minimum 88 IQ when writing the script, and mixed in some great action scenes and camera technique and like a casserole made of good leftovers came up with an extremely palatable meal.

So yes I enjoyed it and couldn’t be happier.  I am a fan of Arnold the Actor (Arnold the Governor is another story, but we can put that behind us) and want to see his career flourish.  Like the tool used for it’s correct function when he is given a role that suites his style he is really good.  David Ayers managed to keep a lot of the things that make Arnold Arnold; muscles, a workout scene at the gym, machismo, giant cigars.  However he cut out all the crap that has attached itself to Arnold like muck in a rain gutter: cheesy one liners, “comedy” sidekicks, the need to be super human at all times.  The film took a nose dive into that bad campyness in the denouement but managed to pull out before impacting the deck.  Overall a fun movie with more complexity than one would expect based on any other movie he has done since True Lies.

Not to say the film is flawless.  The complexity of the plot and motivations of the individual characters gets downright murky at times, and the pacing shifts from 33 to 45 in the last 15 minutes.  Even I, with my stupendously massive brain (and modesty) found my head being scratched and the word “huh?” escaping my lips upon occasion.  (As an aside in the world of dating you would be surprised how unimpressive a high IQ is to most women.  Not that I’m bitter).  For the most part however I found the story tight and the characters appealing.  What more could one ask for?

SabotageThe story is of John “Breacher” Wharton (Arnold Schwartzenegger-Terminator, Total Recall, Conan the Barbarian) and his elite special operations team of the DEA.  His team is comprised of James “Monster” Murray (Sam Worthington-Avatar, Wrath of the Titans, the Debt), Joe “Grinder” Phillips (Joe Mangeniello-Spider-Man, Magic Mike, What to Expect when You’re Expecting), Eddie “Neck” Jordan (Josh Holloway-Paranoia, Battle of the Year, Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol), Julius “Sugar” Edmonds (Terrence Howard-Iron Man, Prisoners, Red Tails), Tom “Pyro” Roberts (Max Martini-Pacific Rim, Captain Phillips, Saving Private Ryan), Bryce “Tripod” McNeely (Kevin Vance-End of Watch), “Smoke” Jennings (Mark Schlegel), and Lizzy Murray (I guess only the dudes get maVide Game T Shirtscho nicknames like they are Medal of Honor avatars played by 13 year old boys.  Mireille Enos-World War Z, the Killing, Gangster Squad.  MOH logo courtesy of the Video Game T Shirt category).

They raid the house of a drug cartel and during the raid as a group steal $10 million and flush it down the toilet (literally).  However when they get down to the sewer the money is all gone.  They are all investigated for the theft (somehow the FBI could tell there was $10 mil missing off the monstrous pile of money that got set on fire) and are on suspension.  Eventually the investigation is dropped and they get together only to find that none of them trust each other.

At that point someone starts killing them off one by one.  The movie basically turns into a game of Clue with guns.  Police investigator Caroline (Olivia Williams-the Sixth Sense, RusSabotagehmore, the Postman) is looking into it while dealing with testosterone charged troublesome personalities.  Clues are uncovered, houses are raided, and the surprise twist is revealed (I actually saw it coming but never forget that stupendously massive brain).  In the last 15 minutes the movie takes a slight detour into cheesy action movie ending but then gets back on track.

The stars:

I love the idea of an action movie with more story than just “the bad guy killed my family/stole my money (or top secret list of US spies)/is a drug dealer/wants to blow something up because he is some kind of unspecified terrorist/kidnapped my girlfriend.  One star.  Arnold Schwarzenegger will always get a star even in the worst film for me (well, maybe not Batman and Robin or Junior), and this film suited him very well without catering to the crappy “Schwarzeneggerisms” that drag down a lot of his films.  Two stars.  The rest of the cast really nailed it and made us care about them collectively.  One star.  Olivia Williams was exceptionally good, and super hot.  Some women can really pull off short hair.  One star.  Great action sequences.  If you liked the action from Training Day and End of Watch you will love it.  One star.  A little bit of nudity goes a long way, especially when most of the screen is filled with macho white trash dudes.  One star.  In general a fun movie.  One star.  Total: eight stars.

The black holes:

The story was complicated and not in the clever way of “Oh, that totally makes sense” as the credits role.  One black hole.  The motivations for any of the characters to do almost any of the things they do is tertiary at best.  I don’t want to spoil this film but a lot of it boiled down to “These characters are crazy and willing to throw their lives away because…they are crazy.”  Very weak.  One black hole.  As much as I liked most of the characters the idea that this bunch of red neck militia mercenaries and drug addicts are part of an elite law enforcement unit was kind of laughable.  One black hole.  The weird shift of tone in the last 15 minutes only to shift back had all the spoor of the director caving in to either some studio executives or Arnold himself.  It felt really out of place.  One black hole.  Total: four black holes.

A grand total of four stars.  That’s in the good zone for me but just barely (mediocre is 2 black holes to about 3 stars).  Definitely worth seeing but set your expectations realistically.  I think this movie will not do well at the box office due to lack of audience focus to be honest.  It’s too much a shoot ’em up for the people who like complicated stories and too convoluted for those who just like to see people shooting each other.  Date movie?  Nope.  Bathroom break?  Any of the scenes between Olivia and Arnold where they are not with anyone else could be missed pretty easily.

Thanks for reading.  I have Bad Words lined up for tonight and am really looking forward to it.  I haven’t had a lot of luck with Jason Bateman films in the past but after hearing his interview on Howard Stern I have to give it a fair shake.  It sounds pretty hilarious.  I might not write it up until Sunday as all the planets seemed to have aligned themselves and I have a second date tomorrow afternoon.  Wish me luck.  Follow me on Twitter @Nerdkungfu.  If you have a comment on this film or my review please leave it here and if you have an off topic question or suggestion email it to [email protected].  Talk to you soon.

Dave


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