By / 8th September, 2013 / Funny t-shirts, T-Shirts / No Comments

Blue Jasmine Movie Review

Blue is the word to describe it.

Before I get into this review I have a question.  The first thing we saw when the opening credits starting rolling were the words “Sony Pictures Classics”.  Is it fair to call a movie out for a month a classic?  Is it automatically a classic just because it’s a Woody Allen film?  Does that mean Zelig is a classic?  I don’t think that one will make anyone’s top 1,000 classic movies.  The hubris of it just struck me as the film opened.  I’m sure there is some corporate reason (i.e. Sony Pictures Classics is a separate entity from Sony Pictures, etc.) but it might seem a little less cocky if they had gone with “Sony Pictures” and added the word classics for the DVD release.

It is the mark of a great artist that he or she never falls into the trap of recreating past success over and over again.  In other words, a truly creative soul creates something new every time.  I start with this statement to help me get my head around the fact that this movie is truly a bummer, and based upon the fact that Woody Allen’s last two movies that I saw were kind of upbeat I was really caught off guard.  The two movies I saw recently were Match Point and Midnight in Paris, both of which kind of had upbeat endings.

Woody Allen is a master of characters, and more importantly in casting.  I don’t know what bug crawled into his ear to cast Andrew Dice Clay as a serious blue collar laborer but having seen it I have to say brilliant move.  In fact all of his castings are great, with Kate Blanchett as the neurotic upper class socialite, Alec Baldwin as her cheating, thieving husband, and Sally Hawkins as her put upon working class adopted sister.  Each person seemed perfect for the role they were given.

And yet it’s the characters where this film most fall apart, at least contextually.  This film was supposed to be Woody Allen doing a film set in San Francisco and while his location scouts did a great job picking out scenic Bay Area spots I can say having lived here for the last 12 or so years all of his “San Francisco” characters are New York characters that happen to be filmed in San Francisco.  The working class characters are all pretty clearly New Jersey transplants.  The dentist character came from I-don’t-know-where (maybe 1958?) and the love interest lacked all kinds of depth (that might have been a conscious decision by Woody, but it’s hard to tell).  About half the film takes part in flashbacks to New York and honestly I couldn’t see any difference in any of the people in any way.  He might as well just had the whole thing happen in New York and saved on his travel budget.

While I’m sure the subtle character differences will not even be noticed by 99% of the non-Bay Area movie goers as a part of that 1% I found it de-immersive and distracting.  On the other hand, maybe I’m just being overly sensitive.

Anyway, the movie.  It’s the story of Jasmine (Cate Blanchett-LOTR, Hanna, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button), a formerly wealthy snobby NYC housewife and social climber who finds herself destitute after her husband Hal (Alec Baldwin-30 Rock, Rock of Ages, the Departted) is caught by the FBI cheating people and hangs himself in a prison cell.  She flies to San Francisco to stay with her adopted sister Ginger (Sally Hawkins-Happy-Go-Lucky, Layer Cake, Never Let Me Go) and her two boys.  Turns out Hal managed to rip off Ginger and her now ex-husband Augie (Andrew Dice Clay-the Adventures of Ford Fairlane, Pretty In Pink, Dice Rules) for their life savings.  He’s bitter but she doesn’t blame Jasmine.  Ginger has a new boyfriend auto mechanic Chilli (Bobby Cannavale-Parker, the Station Agent, Win Win) who wants to move in with Ginger but has to put his plans on hold when Jasmine takes up the space.

At that point the stage is more or less set for the combined slow motion mental break down with the very, very typical reverse Beverly Hillbillies “rich person learns how to survive with the rest of us dregs of humanity” (a plot premise that somehow always kind of infuriates me).  She meets a perfect man to be her next husband (I can’t figure out his credit.  IMDB fail) but he dumps her when he figures out she has been lying to him about her past.  Ginger has an affair with a guy she met at a party (Louis C.K.-Louis, Down to Earth, Pootie Tang).  Jasmine tries to connect with her estranged son Danny (Alden Ehrenreich-Stoker, Tetro, Beautiful Creatures).  I don’t want to spoil this film for anyone but if you didn’t read the first two paragraphs of this review don’t be expecting to feel good on the way out the door.

The stars. 

Brilliant casting.  I especially liked Dice Man.  Two stars.  Woody Allen is in the business of creating characters, and he does a wonderful job with Jasmine.  Two stars.  I managed to find a reason to connect with and care about all the main characters (except for Jasmine’s boyfriend.  He was kind of a non-entity).  One star.  The story of Hal and his business failings were delivered in a series of non-linear flashbacks that I really thought clever and very well done.  Two stars.  Brilliant job with the makeup for Kate.  Sometimes she looked stunning and sometimes she looked like a bag lady.  Brilliant.  One star.  About as clever and sophisticated as one expects from a Woody Allen film.  One star.  Total: nine stars.

The black holes. 

The whole thing about doing a film set in San Francisco but populating it with all New York personalities grated.  One black hole.  A couple of the characters didn’t do much and kind of annoyed.  I thought Jasmine’s son Danny was a particularly whiny bitch.  One black hole.  The film felt about 10 minutes too short.  I was still waiting for the denouement when the credits started rolling.  One black hole.  At the end of the film I was left with a weighty “What was the point?” feeling.  The movie was good but really what message was being delivered?  210-2TThat being broke and having a nervous breakdown sucks even for beautiful women?  That a good man is hard to find?  That we all sow the seeds of our own self destruction?  All of these seem a little trite and prosaic for a Woody Allen film.  Maybe I’m just not smart enough to really see the point, but that is how I left the theater.  One black hole.  Total: four black holes.

(Well Adjusted image courtesy of the Funny t-shirt category)

A grand total of five stars.  A credible score, and well worth watching if you have hit your action and explosion saturation point (if you haven’t this movie might drag for you).  Not his best work (I know I’m alone in this but I still love Sleeper) but if I weren’t distracted by the whole San Francisco/character thing I probably would have enjoyed it a great deal more.  Date movie?  I will give that question a tentative yes.  If she identifies you with Chilli than you will gain credit for being a blue collar honest dude.  If she identifies you with Hal the frozen legions of Frosty the Snowman will have conquered Hell before you see her naked (unless you are as rich as Hal was, but in that case why are you even taking her to a movie?).  Bathroom break?  Most of the scenes are pretty good by themselves, and it’s hard to identify one that is not kind of critical to the plot.  Most of the flashbacks are really important and come without warning.  I’d say hold it.  It’s only 98 minutes.

Thanks for reading.  I have tickets to see Riddick in about two hours so look for that tomorrow.  Follow me on Twitter @Nerdkungfu.  Feel free to post any comments on this review or the movie here, and if you have off topic questions or suggestions email them to [email protected].  Talk to you soon.

Dave


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