By / 9th June, 2011 / Movie T-Shirts, T-Shirts / No Comments

Nerd Dating: the greatest date ever-movie night in Part 6 even more what to watch

Yes I am continuing with this.  It amuses me.

Action-this is a fail hole like no other.  If you suggest an action film she will make the (probably correct) assumption that you are an insensitive jerk who does not care one bit about her or what she wants to do.  If she suggests an action film, this is absolutely, 100% a test to see if you are in insensitive jerk who does not care one bit about her or what she wants to do.  It can occasionally be colored by a desire on her part to make you happy, but even then the test is still there and to say anything other than “I don’t know if that’s appropriate” is to fail miserably.  Don’t fall into this trap.

Porn-are you really dumb enough to even need instructions on this?  Unless she is actually a sex worker, as far as she knows you never even watch porn, much less have a Congressional Library sized collection.

Sexy comedy/drama-these are films which are good stories and acting combined with some hot sex scenes.  These are excellent for movie night as they show her you’re interested in sex without looking like you are obsessed with it (which, odds are, you are).  Also, while porn will in most (normal) cases just disgust her, seeing two attractive people roll around in bed showing a rated R amount of skin will actually peak a lot of women’s interest.  Unfortunately, this is a genre that has really been dropped by Hollywood in the last few years.  I guess they feel the need to cater to the freaking ankle biters.  God forbid we should make a movie you can’t bring your screaming three year old to in order to make the hapless nerd movie reviewer three rows behind you miserable.  But I digress.  You have to go back a few years to find something that is both of good quality and has the appropriate amount of nudity.  Risky Business and Fatal Attraction are two that spring to mind.  Also, don’t fall into the trap of assuming anything rated R will work for this.  Both of the Hangover movies were rated R and for the most part had a lot of man penis and cussing in them and not a lot else.

Romantic Comedy-ah, now you are thinking.  These movies should get her laughing and also thinking about how miserable her single life really is.  If you suggest one it will make you look sensitive and cool.  If she suggest one she is throwing you a life preserver.  Don’t fail to grab it.  Modern ones are fine, but I personally find classics from the 80’s work really well.

Comedies-these can be hit or miss.  She could be the type who really likes comedies and will get turned on by laughing at one.  Or she could be the type who puts these in the same mental category as action films.  Also, there are varying levels of crudeness in comedies and while one film might make  her laugh her clothes off another film might well disgust her to the hilt and you by association.  Picking a comedy is a lot like the white trash sport of noodling; sometimes you get a delicious catfish, and sometimes you lose a finger to a snapping turtle.  Stay away, and if she suggest one assume it is a test similar to the action film test.

The Princess Bride-why does this film deserve it’s own listing, last on my list?  Because it is possibly the greatest movie night date of all time.  There isn’t a woman I have met who doesn’t love or get turned on by this film, and better yet it is cool and funny enough to hold the most macho guy’s interest.  This is one you really can’t go wrong on (actually, failure is the mother of invention, so there is probably a decent chance you will still find a way to screw this up.  However, I hold that unless your date is some kind of alien it will never be this movies fault).  In a weird twist of mental fate no woman I know would ever actually suggest this, possibly because they assume you would hate it of perhaps for fear of being perceived as too girly.  You, on the other hand, will gain massive props for having suggested it.  (Inigo Montoya image courtesy of the movie t shirt category).

That’s it for movies.  I need to think about where I am going next with this topic, so I may well give it a rest for a day or two.  New movies coming out this weekend so look for some movie reviews soon.  Talk to you soon.


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