Movie Review: The Guard
So the date I had Thursday was one of the best I’ve ever had. I had some comments on what I think is going on, but just decided I don’t want to shoot from the hip and screw things up until I have a better grip on what the deal is. She is a great girl, and I hope once she gets over her ex she figures out that I am a great guy.
Anyway, the movie we saw was The Guard, is an Irish film that was ridiculously funny and charming. In fact, it was probably the best date movie we could have picked out. I laughed my ass off, and we had a lot to talk about afterward. I do recommend it highly.
The story is of an Irish policeman (apparently called Guards over there, or Garda) named Gerry Boyle (Brendan Gleeson – Gangs of New York, Troy, Mad-Eye Moody from Harry Potter) who is grizzled and unorthodox. He apparently does drugs a lot, regularly hires hookers, and has ties to the IRA. Somehow he still retains a core of integrity with regards to his job. He gets paired up with uptight FBI agent Wendell Everett (Don Cheadle – Iron Man 2, a bunch of other crap including Hotel for Dogs. Iron Man image courtesy of the Marvel comic t shirt category) who is on the trail of international drug smugglers who are looking to land their product on the Irish coast. Boyle comes across as a racist, ignorant Irishman but as the movie progresses you realize it is a front to hide his sharp mind.
Pretty much every character is hilarious, and they all play together well. Most of the rest of the Garda is somehow corrupt and is bribed to look the other way. Boyle runs through the movie like a wrecking ball with a devil may care attitude that I appreciated. Everett has all kinds of problems with him but in the end appreciates what he is. Drug bust hijinks ensues. Some guys get shot (not as many in most American cop films). You spend about 1/3rd of the movie trying to figure out what the last guy said in his Irish brogue.
The stars. Brendan Gleeson was awesome and funny. Two stars. All the rest of the characters were pretty cool, including the American and the drug smugglers. One star. Good story and dialog. Two stars. Set in Ireland. One star. They kept the gun play to a minimum. One star. All the humor was really tongue in cheek and required you to pay attention. One star. Two really hot Irish prostitutes made a gratuitous but appreciated appearance, and there was a wife who was super hot too. One star. Overall a good movie. One star. Total: ten stars.
The black holes. There were points where the Irish accented English could have used a subtitle, causing me to think I missed a lot. One black hole. The last ten minutes devolved into a typical gun action cop movie. One black hole. While it may or may not be true, the movie did not paint Irish cops in a very positive light. One black hole. Total: three black holes.
So a total of seven stars, a great score. I really enjoyed this film and think I will try to see it again some time to try to pick up on the stuff I might have missed. I might suggest it to my friends for movie night as well. The shooting wasn’t exceptional IMO, so in spite of having the chance to film amazing gorgeous Irish countryside the film tends to focus on the characters and be a little on the bland side. Not enough to warrant a black hole, but enough to say it would be OK to watch on your screen at home. NetFlix it.
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